that is very true and lets not forget killer robots from the future and head-hunters from space.
*what ever you do don't make any sudden moves*

Are those head-hunters you mention hot by any chance *wink*wink*
I hear the needle of a syringe can stab right through a heavly armored frigate, imagine a person *shiver*. So all we have to do is slowly get to the elvator and pray to whatever god that exist that the medical demon dosen't catch us......you go first.

Well if you think dreadlocks,mandibals and with cloaking technology and comes to earth to just to hunt us...then yes if not,no.
I heard that to,but I thought it was a dreadnought? If Im going first I need you to create distraction or will both be dead within minutes,man where's Isaac when you need him?

.....Forget I said anything.
Frigate, dreadnought, same thing
I'm not sure what I could use to distract a syringe, but maybe I could throw a first-aid kit at it and might go after it instead of us. Also, I'm not sure where Isaac is, but the last time I heard he ended up in a crossover fanfic with Mass Effect and somehow got into a relationship with a purple suited alien chick with a Russian accent....or something like that the info is a little hazy.

That true I'm going off of star wars or something. Don't throw the first-aid we might need it, for all we know *looks around* its not alone. Isaac with Tali what the hell that's not shouldn't, man I'm been trying to get her and Isaac gets her...she has a Russian accent?

Whoa, don't say stuff like that you might jinx us an-*notices that more syringes appeared out of nowhere* oh crap you just had to go and say that. Yeah I was kind of surprised but it has to be a rumor, It's hard to believe that some 40 something year old badass mangaged to start something with someone who is twenty years younger then him. Also his first-contact with aliens wasn't exactly "pleasent" to began with but what do I know. And Tali's accent.....well.....she has a something accent that sounds familiar and a few people seem to agree....so yeah. Wait.....aren't we suppose to get out of here.

Sorry,I didn't mean to do that.*looks around* Okay if we slowly walk to the elevator we might make it.*start to walk slowly* Its one step for mankind, its two guys about to die by syringes. Dame necros always ruining someones day,and that was not in the job description. tali is going freak out when she see how he fights? *shiver in horror* I think its because they vibrate her voice or something.

Almost there, just a few more-*SQUICK*(steps on a necromorph plushy) DAMN IT ALL TO HELL RUN!!! EVERY MAN FOR HIM SELF!!!!!! heh hah hah vibrate. I could imagine what their conversation would be like.
Isaac: *killing a sh*t load of necromorpths that came out of nowhere for unexplained reasons with his bare hands*.....Done...so what were you saying.
Tali: OoO Keelah!, where did you learn to fight like that, I thought were a engineer not a bloodraged Krogan.
Isaac: Simple, alien extermination is my part time job....that and plumbing.
Tali: Wait you wha-
Isaac: *interrupts Tali* I think we should find a different place to talk before more of them show up, lets keep moving.....oh and Tali.
Tali: Uh...yes.
Issac: Don't call me Keelah.
Tali:

*watch you run* You coward its just a plushy. Man and here I thoug-*drool drops from the sealing* oh shit, RUN YOU FOOL,RUN LIKE LITTLE GIRLS!! WERE THE HELL IS A WEAPON WHEN YOU NEED!!!

DON'T WORRY I GOT MY INVISBLE MAGIC HAND PISTOL I FORGOT I HAD TILL NOW!!! *makes a gun hand gesture then points at the monsters making gun blast sounds* PEW PEW PEW BANG BANG BANG BANG ZAP ZAP ZAP RATA TAT TAT RATA TAT PEW PEW BANG ZAP BOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!......did I get them?

*looks disappointed at you* My god you got to be kidding me. *presses a button on wrist* This is a weapon. *big flash,all monsters fall dead* this is what you get when you visit madman conviction. Can you top that? ...and do you have an "invisible magic gun?"

You want it, it's yours my friend as long as you have enough rupees-wait I mean credit-no I meant dollers....crap
Invisible weaponery is not exactly cheap you know.

Nah,if I have it then I'll might lose it. But thanks for the offer,so where do we go from here,its not like theres a map here.

Its cool, I had a similar problem when I "misplaced" my invisible nuclear powered flying car... yeah. Also, it's not like a map would pop out of nowhere like a cheap dues ex or something dumb like that.....actually....when and where the hell are we?

Where in the devils black heart,do you get this stuff? I mean,I can get supplies from here and there. But a Invisible Nuclear Powered Flying Car? How & Why? Who did you blow to get this stuff? True but at least some kind of "map." and I'm not sure when,how,what or who did
this.*look at a lever*wounder what this does. *pulls the lever,a door opens up to a spaceship*...what take a ride?

*gives you a menacing stare* ...That...is...non...of...your...concern. And about the spaceship......I CALL SHOTGUN!!! Let's get away from here before more of them sho-*bunch of monsters and evil medical tools show up*....OH CRAP, WE GOT TO GO NOW!!!! I hope you know how to drive...or fly this thing.

Okay,sorry, but still man that some heavy shit you got there. There is no shotgun a spaceship,there's navcom. OK,we need to stop saying stuff that we know is going to happen.*runs up the ramp*why does this place look familiar? I think I can,*grins*strap in,this is going wild ride. *engines starts up*

Its cool....just don't ask about the invisible alien girl on girl porno mags that I have under my shirt.....un...forget I said anything. NAVCOM......wait what?! Now when you mention it, this place does seem kinda familiar. I'm half expecting a giant tentacle monster or giant terminator ripoff to pop out of nowhere to screw us like screws and....I said stuff that's going to happen didn't I.....Well non of that will matter in the next few secounds once we get the eff out of here.....CRANK THAT B*CH UP!!!

*left eyebrow*Alien girl porno? what the hell? It doesn't matter right now, its no worse then Hentai star wars...I mean,ah shit. Navigation Computer I was thinking of a little of Star wars or something along those lines and I don't see anything coming out anywhere, but still stop saying shit! *the lifts off*Lets ride*the ship blast off into space* HELL YEAH!!

What was that you just said. Oh....its a GPS then. Yeah Star Wars.....I sorta see it now. The last thing we need is a force powered Sith Lo-*smacks self in the head* STOP TALKING!! STOP TALKING!!! WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWHERE ARE WE GOINGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-

Nothing you need to know about! just drop it or your taking a long walk out the air lock. Are we clear? More or less but for space...I think.
hmm I wouldn't mine Darth Talon or Ashoka tano you know what I mean.*looks behind* Dammit nothing. *checks computers*Some place called planet 146-8769.why do I have a felling that its not a vacation place.*gets up*Its on auto-lock, lets take a look around the ship or find something to eat a least. And stop yelling its not that fast.

Okay okay....fine fine were clear I'll drop it....jerk. Yeah when we want something that is good it won't happen.....why can't we ever have nice things. Well it can't be as bad as the planet numbered 34-1337-69.....I....really don't think this is a place that you want to bring your kids to....just saying. Sorry, I got a little too excited....so let's see what they got in the fridge.....mmmm booze no........not sure what this is......I don't think this was meant for humans to eat......OH SWEET a "Quarian Burger" this sh*t is the best.

Your calling me a jerk?What the hell! Your one to talk...jerk. That's not true*points at the wall*this is good. "Liara and Tali 'hugging' each other" Why does most planets or all have 69 at the end? Did they run out of numbers or is it an idiot taking his turn at irony...lets leave that one alone. I thought Quarians ate stuff from tube or something? *looks in a cabinet* What the is N-sauce? And whats Bindo beans? I going to find the Cargo hold see if there's some food store away back there*walks off*

I said beef jerky you turkey. OH THANK YOU GOD, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!....wait why is there a poster of....AH who cares. Mostly because the people who number them are a bunch of sexual deviant trolls. Yeah you go do that *talks to himself* Of course its not really a burger, a sorta friend/dealer of mine Hiroplex and I just call it that just to trick dumb people into buying and eating...or slurping it to watch them get stoned off of it then we make a profit out of it and have a trip on our own "product" due to the fact we're crazy as hell.

Sure you did mate,that's what they all say. Beef Jerky my ass. We have more important things to attend to then this poster,*looks at the poster* then again...no we got work to do! *talks to himself*now think its around here, *looks around*oh darling you look good, haven't seen you in years...damn you Xbox 360.*picks up a small container*Know how do I open again? *computer over com*WE WILL ENTER THE SYSTEM IN LESS THAN THREE MINUTES PLEASE STAND BY.Well then back to cockpit and whatnot.

Your ass is made of Beef Jerky?!?!?! Must..look..away..from..poster..too..hot..to..resist..typing..gone..Shatner..eeghehghgehgehghgh *quickly jerk my head away nearly getting whiplash* AHHHHH....ow my neck. Alright we're almost there and hope to god this planet we're going to isn't hostile...I mean...I hope this planet is NON-hostile and give us free gift baskets when we get there.....please. So what did you find in the cargo-hold anything yummy that won't kill us mainly me....and are you sure you don't want this "burger".....it's to "DIE" for.

*just glare at you* That's what you get when don't know how to become...partly immune.*looks at the poster*we shall meet again ladies.
With our luck I don't think so,*looks at the screens*umm that's really dark I mean really dark,that pitch bla-*a reddish-orange demonic face appears*Okay that not right. Nothing for you need to worry about right now,so no and if you keep trying I'm going shoot you out the airlock got it? and I already know what it can do you sleemo!

*smiles innocently* Damn my freaking neck *rubs muscle cream*, who knew that looking at posters could cause so much pain. Un...I'm not too good with space science, but do planets normally do that? Okay okay no need to use a airlock as a solution to solve all your problems with its cool.....*says under my breath* damn and I was all going to have all the food to my self....*normal voice*....are you very sure you don't want just a quick harmless teeny weenie nibble.

Where the hell did you get...you know screw it. the poster can be yours if resist it for a few hours. Uhh *looks at the planet's "face"* No.We might know better if we landed,*looks at the ComScreens* says here, its a an illusion of some sort *looks at the "face"* Umm I'm calling bullshit on this. *pulls out a laser pistol* Did you know a laser pistol was invented by a kid who had a mental illness *looks at you,eyes turn into sith eyes*

Yeah, its best you don't ask. Oh boy, that's a deal that is going to be very hard to follow through....*almost looks at the poster again* DON'T LOOK DON'T LOOK!!! Yeah, I call bull on that too. It looks like it's going to eat us if we get too close....I don't think its a good idea to land if we don't know what's down there....doesn't this thing have one of those un...probe things to gather info on stuff. Shutting up now. *goes back to the fridge and throws the "burger" to the very back of the freezer*

Yep *pulls out a lighter* I'll burn it and you if this kept up. You got me? *looks at screens* umm no, but it looks like were going down anyway...damn auto lock. *presses a buttons* Hey I'm getting a signal *signal massages "Twinkle Twinkle little star how
I wonder what you are-" end massages* Okay your turn.

Mmm mmm You. Wouldn't. Dare. Ooookay lets see....huh there a radio signal....patching through....*turns the radio on* "We're Whalers on the moo-" *quickly turns the radio off*...we lost the signal.

I would. Do I even want to know who the Whalers are? OK we're entering the Atmosphere and the nearest landing pad is 20 clicks from here so we better get ready... *looks at you* are you okay?

I won't look anymore! >< Futurama reference.....anyway other then the fact I may have 1 and 2ed myself in sheer terror of being murdered and T-Bagged to death by whatever is down there.....I'm okay.

...Yep I doubt there going to Tea-Bag you, now murder is a different story. hmm I wonder *press a few buttons* hey the place we're going is called is Ascension falls, heh, that's Irony for you. I'm sure there OK or normal for the most pa- *computer status* hmm last check population is 35,670,234...check 5 hours ago...population is 0.

Un yeah, this is not making me feel any better then I already am now. So unless the computer is malfunctioning it's saying that there was life here just five hours ago and now its zip Nada gone.....I don't like where this is going at all....heh irony. I for one have no interest of finding out who or what caused the population to just drop like that. We should leave and find a different planet while we still got the chance.

I know that. Its not the computer, its what happen and I don't think we're here to enjoyed the view. I hope we can get out of here anyway. Hold on...*presses a few buttons* and we got something OK hold on to something were be exiting the system in 5,
4,3,2,1*we inter hyperspace* there we go lets find another system.*checks the navcom* so we could go to Tatooine, I hear the weather nice thins time of year or we Hoth its winter so that's out of the question.Oh there is Vulcan...option?

Mmmm what to choose....I would suggest we close are eyes, spin the ship around, and randomly land on whatever planet the ship takes us to....just saying.

I agree *The ship begins to turn then stops* um I think we're out of gas *gets up to the engine room* hmm *yells
up front* start it up again! *talks to myself* while I'm back here lets if I get that box open *5 minutes trying to get the box open* damn this thing tough *looks and sees a red circle* what does this do *presses it,It start to glow* ohh pretty lights heh.

Yeah yeah I hear you *revs the engine then it starts up*...here we go she's kicking again...*notices the bright light at the back of the ship*....um dude, want are you doing back there... *goes and opens the door to the engine room* okay what's with the light show and-HOLY MOTHER OF BONG SMOKERS BATMAN WHAT DID YOU DO!!!

*looks like about to freak out* I-I open up a cube that known as the staff of life and don't you freak out on me you were trying to feed me stuff that would kill me,you sleemo. My god I need you to sh-*Incoming ship...Imperial class Star Destroyer 'Hunter'* okay *closes the box, heads up front to the cockpit* come on lets see who's in charge!

Weird that something like "THE STAFF OF LIFE" would be on a ship like this....come to think of it....who the heck owned this ship before we...."commandeered" it. Oh by the way, the "burger" would of made you high as hell not kill you..... all the way. Mmmm maybe it's your mom who's in charge....ZING!

I agree, but it's a cube and not a staff, wonder why? *looks for last owner* umm somebody called Revan... hope not the dark lord himself right. And that burger is what wrong with you in the first place. Lol that's funny...just like your mom&dad! ZING!!!

Mmmm sounds like a upstanding fellow....but his sh*t is ours now....so yeah. *looks at you with a derp-assed expression* What do you mean the burger is what's wrong with me? .....Just go out and see who it is to find out if they're here to blow us up or not.

I don't think so. Just look at the pretty lights. *presses a button* Hello this Revilo speaking how may I help you. *coms open up "You stand down and await to be boarded, you'll be sent to the brig for crossing Imperial space you Republic scum!" coms closes*

Well whoever this Reven guy is probably got screwed by those monsters we encountered earlier. Um...where did they get the idea that we're Republic? *whispers to Revilo* From what I could tell, I don't think they're going to give us any gift baskets if they board.

Damn those syringes...damn them. Well it doesn't matter now we're heading into hyperspace now, well be over Vulcan in about a hour or two so yeah...I'm going to find out this thing is*walks to the cargo room with the box* stop eating those burgers man!

*munching and slurping down "burgers" like no tomorrow* ........You say something.

*flash a light your way* *opens up the Staff of Life* Um, how do you work? *turns around to find plants* ah!! What the hell is this? Dude get back.

*drops the burgers and goes over to your side* Um, dude what's with the plants and.....want me to get the invisible weed killer?

That's not going to work, its...ah growing. We're dead if we don't find a way kill it or something *closes the box, plants stop growing* OK get your weed killer thing and kill these thing we be on Vulcan an half hour.

*grabs the weed killer and starts spraying everywhere* THE POWER OF CHEMICAL COMPOUNDS COMPEL YOU, THE POWER OF CHEMICAL COMPOUNDS COMPEL YOU!!!! ......I think that's all of them...where did all that sh*t come from.

The power of chemical compounds compels you? What the hell? The box, you know the staff of light i think it's meant for terraforming or something.

Um sorry, I got carried away a bit. Really.....so we have a portable salad buffet in a rod?!?

I'm sure. It's really a box...a salad box. "VULCAN IN FIVE MINUTES" OK we need to make sure that this not found by the Vulcans or where in horse sh*t and I will call Bullsh*t on all this if it gets out of hand and you will be first to go in the fire if I have any say in it, savvy?

YEAH-um wait.......HELL NO TO YOUR SAVVY!!! If I'm going down in flames I'll be sure to take you with me....savvy.

I know but what I'm saying you get first dive in the fire pit. Come on *runs up to the cockpit* Vulcan is the last place I want to be and the only place I want to be, by god its a freaking desert on the godforsaken world. Hey do you have any idea what happen to Tali & Isaac or am I hoping to much for this?

Godforsaken indeed, but if were trying not to go there where to? Do I look a information broker to you? How the heck should I know where they are, It's not like I keep tabs on random badass engineers of interest. For all we know, they could be 50 thousand lightyears from here and the odds that one or both of them being here is.....very slim. It's not they like they would show up out of nowhere asking for directions the moment I stop talking...................so yeah.

...We need a guide or something or we'll be flying randomly around like a couple of morons. I was just wondering mate, *looks for the poster* um where did the poster...it was right here and why are you still eating those burgers...you know what screw it you wanna die go ahead and beside your crazy as hell. *coms up "greetings who are you and what is business with Vulcan" coms closes* ...um we need a place to stay and to refuel while we're here and to purchase a star map of any kind mate, over. *coms open "docking bay 95/SA/19" com closes* mighty grateful your Vulcaness so what now?

Moron as in you right? *mischievous grin* It's fine, but it would crazy as hell if they were here....cuz I'm damn sure I might get star struck if I see them....and maybe get an autograph afterwords. Mm we could either:
1. Grab something to eat that won't kill us mainly me.
2. Get into mischief. (pranking)
3. Go to a random bar and get pissed drunk and wake up to the events of The Hangover: Part 3.
4. Blow the sh*t out of something.
5. Start up a fight for no reason.
6. Eavesdrop on people to hear if they have interesting info on current events that may or may not have anything to do with us entirely.

Well it wouldn't be that crazy, I mean it possible they are at a warzone or something. Here's one how bout all the above?

*evil grin* I like how you think....It's time to raise some hell.....we're going to need to find something explosive, somewhere to eat, somewhere to get a drink while getting into a fight, a video camara, and...well..there is alot of people to spy on.

No explosives mate what we need cal'foamic powder. This place has tons of cameras and there is several places that has good food, I mean for a Vulcan at least and spying is for someone who cares.

Mmmm your right too many witnesses and too many cameras to do anything explosive-y.....What kind of places do they have would be great to eat at? And I don't see anyone with high resolution who looks importent to spy on.....we might need to sneak around Snake style till we find someone of interest.

Yep an unless you want those witnesses then that's out of the question. It's called Cosmosion, it's sapposed to be a Vulcan version of Pizza Hut and or Burger King. We need to get to the Embassies to find these people but it shouldn't be to hard to find someone... and I'm not going to crawl under a box around here.

Yeah, just forget I brought up the whole exploding thing. Pizza Hut and Burger King.....KICKASS!!! Boxes are sooooo 2005, we shall use octocamoflage to get by *presses self against a wall in a weird assed pose with a stupid look on my face getting stared at by everyone passing by* ......If I wasn't so sure....I think they'd see me.

Wait what exploding thing? Love that movie!!! I'm pretty sure you need a new plan because this one already in the crapper. I think I got idea *pics up rock and throws it a Vulcan* make a run for it!!

*Tries to change the subject*....Um...what cat? That....was TOTALLY what I trying to go for......yeah. CHEESE IT *takes off running quickly hides self in a dark ally* dude are you crazy.....well I mean....are you trying to be crazier then me or something.

...It ends... I'll bet, but lets try next time, eh Comrade? Do I have to answer? Because your not like it.

I hear a lot of crazy answers in my time, I'm all ears.

Okay...
A. I'm with you.
B. If you combined joker and scarecrow together you get me.
C. I cause random people to do random acts...*a random guy starts running into a wall*...see. And last but not least (I'm with you.)

Huh...
A. Define "I'm with you".
B.
C. I'm pretty sure that guy was on something.
And what do you mean your with me, is it some secret code phrase that you told me, but I was to busy looking at a very hot poster to listen to you.

For one your insane just as I am and you shouldn't be surprised about B. *another random guy runs by naked*:WWEEE!!!!IMMA NAKED: you see my point yet? ...no.

Can't agrue with that. *head regenerates* Yeah the sploding was a bit much wasn't it. Point taken ....never mind then....what now since we (as in you) just assulted some dude with a rock and most likely called the cops on us (you)..... go on a trip to the bar and start fights for no reason.

Good, That's creepy, mate, the head thing.... *picks up another rock*...watch and learn. *throw at the same guy* Book it!!! *I laugh like The Joker* HAHAHAHAHA!!!

Uh...yeah sorry I don't have any control over that. DAMN IT ALL TO HELL RUN!!! *takes a few steps back*....Oooooook just don't show me any "magic tricks" and we're cool

Again I bet. *starts running* Hurry find the ship and we can get off the rock and to another rock. *eyes twitches* ooh what do you mean? *starts twirling a pencil* ... *eyes twitches again* ...

How about a rock that has a bar we can go to. O-o...Uh....no reason...*takes a few more steps away*...lets just keep going.

Hmm...I got it, *gets in the ship* lets head to the citadel. *eyes turns Blue within blue* hmm...I'm feeling a need to eat some spice...*looks around confused* I'm seeing things.

ALRIGHT!! *fist bump* Screw this place, the screaming metal death trap called the Citadel is the place to be. Uh....buddy...did you ingested something before we got on the ship? I think its best if I take the wheel for a bit and you....*sees you bumping against the wall with no reaction* .....should probable lay down for a while.

HELL YEAH TO MAX!!! *starts up the engines* to the Citadel and beyond! *turns to you* What ever do you mean *eyes changing back* heh I'm so pretty and so pretty...*passes out* hrgk orgh smiss shilly bob.

One night at the Citadel and the galaxy is your burrito....or whatever how that song goes. Yeah, I'm just going to take the wheel and you... *sees you passed out on the toilet* ...just do that if you don't mind. OK now where do I punch in the coordinates....uh...oh crap I don't know how to fly a ship....where is the auto-pilot?

I'm going to ignore that. *wakes up* What the hell happening, how the hell get on the toilet, and why is this even happening to us *passes out again* hrck hgpof pogd *ships computer come on* :what the hell are you doing? Can you even fly a ship? Dear god your screw if you think you can fly a ship like me.:

Keep sleeping....just keep sleeping. AHGOODGOD! *falls over the seat then quickly getting back up*....uh...yeah....computer thing...*ahem* AS THE ACTING CAPTAIN OF THIS VESSEL, I COMMAND YOU TO TAKE US TO THE CITADEL POST HASTE! .....please and thank you.

*snores* lease tell me why I should, you haven't even take me out to dinner. Beside I don't think you deserved the title acting captain...sh*t face:

Uh.... I'm not sure if you knew this, but your a effing AI computer system that is incapable of eating...unless you eat "cookies" or something. Though you probable haven't noticed that I'm the only person person that can command the ship since the other captain is.....not in working order at the moment so if you don't like it then tough luck. ....Wait...you haven't gone rampant did you....if that is the case....where is the nearest escape pod because truthfully, I don't want to be forced to compute pi.

*wakes up, barley* surrreee *passes out* :The other person is asleep,and you are no better you organic meatbag and beside even if you were..."capable" I'm voice lock, and only the captain can get to..."unlock" myself:  :I love to burst your bubble, but there's is no escape pods,stupid meatbag:

...Your are not very nice computer lady.....HEY "CAPTAIN" GETS HIGH A LOT, YOUR COMPUTER HOE IS NOT RESPECTING MY AUTHORTAH SO I'M GOING TO NEED TO YOU TO COME OVER HERE AND SAY SOMETHING TO UNLOCK HER OR WHATEVER SHE SAID!!!! ...If we don't have escape pods....do we have life boats *mumbles* you dumb computer chip?

:I don't you have the authority to say that and beside I'm not a "hoe" as you put it, I'm the ship H.A.I, that's makes me smarter then you are, you meatbag.: 'can you kiss me' : it appears that he is having a dream, awww! How cute <3... you get him to his room or so help
me reapers I'll kill where you stands!: o you know how smart I am? That's right you don't but I'll don't need to tell you that since your brain can't with it, calo'das bun'da...meatbag.:

Oh hai, H.A.I. you hoe computer you. Later....and what are you going to do...nag and insult me to death...I like to see you try. I bet you are all talk and you get your smarts from a potato....say something smart...smart ass potato.

:I could say about your mother: :...I-I just don't see my owner get hurt, he the only real thing in my life.: *starts sobbing* *a laser cannon comes out of the floor board* :Now please stop being an ass:

I could also say about your sister oh by the by, she might want to have her wires checked out...just saying. Oh man, look I'm sorry I didn't think that-...wait you only knew us for a few days hell we didn't acquire this ship legit was your last owner a A-hole or something. O_0 *nearly craps self* ....No more ass ma'am.

:My sister happens to be an Eclipse class star destroyer, you know the ship that can destroy a moon and any ship in her way...plus she a lez-ship: :No he wasn't a 'A-hole' /She/ was a very busy women and she always blocks out her cabins cameras, by The Reapers that was a tiresome, and she always brings other...'creatures' on the ship and in her cabin...still weird.: :good,now get him to bed before he catches a cold: hrghs hsfov condive :see what I mean,what the hell did you feed him:

Uh....good for her....*feeling uncomfortable*...so who are your parents? When you say 'creatures' and did you use your scanner thing to find anything that wasn't there before like....a center fluid...on the bed....or something....also...you been using The Reapers quite a bit...you don't worship them do you? I don't know he just started tripping balls out of nowhere....unless he stole my burger stash for himself....that jerk.

:...why?: :Hmm...no not really...oh now I get it and what if I do worship The Reaper? Are you going start preaching about meatbags gods and goddess And no I do not worship them I...uh...dated one of them...and it doesn't matter anymore.: *wakes up* whatthehellhappenwhyamIonthefloorandwhyareyoutalkingsoloundlyrightnow!!!!! .....SHIT!!!....*passes out* :...10101010100011100010101010101000110010....<3:

Just curious. I wasn't going to start preaching about anything, it's just that you made me nervous that you might be working for them or something ....wait you dated a reaper since when, who, and how. ....I can make 1's and 0's ...011010100101111010101001101010111100101010100101 and 0.

:I bet: :I have nothing against religions people it's that they get a bit...rowdy. He's name was Nazaara and he's dead, good bye my genocidal love(sigh)...its been 20 years since that day he set off: :...your so lucky that I don't have body.: hrgns bickksger gadnikj hhiawfn
:...get him in the cabin and in a bed you idiotic meatbag!!:

Uh...he sounded like upstanding fellow who must of contributed much to society and he will be missed...I guess. Okay okay fine if it makes you happy damn I swear *drags you to your cabin and dumps carelessly on the bed* ....there happy now...can we go to the Citadel, PLEASE!

:he's the one who cause saran to try and kill Shepard, so...yeah he is.: :Thank you, now all we have to is what for him to wake
up. Then he will fly us to the Citadel.: :so...where you from and why ya here?: *stats moaning* uhhhhhh mmmmyyyy heeaadd. *passes out...again*

Uh...well...achievement for him I guess. And now we play the waiting game........*passes out from boredom*

:he's an ass...or was an ass: :It's OK, you can wake up now.: *wakes up* Great now where's the Citadel? :It's a few light years from here:
Good, now plot a course and find me something to eat...and get him something else to wear. :<3 oh I love it when you give me orders: I bet.

*starts singing loudly* WE ARE GOING TO THE CITADEL...CITADEL....WE ARE GOING TO THE SCREAMING METAL DEATH TRAP CALLED THE CITADEL...CITADEL!!!!!!

:....not anymore its not at least not now: Yeah but why did they want to make a screaming metal death trap? :How should I know?: Because you dated one ya freaking clock. :So, It's not like he told me his deep dark secrets: But he did tell you something? :Yeah: What?
:a few bases that hold technology that are useless to them and no longing worthy...of *value*: Exactly my love boat. :So do we keep going or turn around and ransack those bases?: Both *looks at you* stop singing...please.

Hold on not done yet *continues singing* I KNOW HOW TO HIDE A DEAD BODY AT THE CITADEL...CITADEL....WE ALL GOING TO PARTY AT THE......CITADELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL AH!......ok now am done. Whats this about a base full of crap.

...I will throw you out the air lock. :Let me do it please: No not now. It's short and simple for you. :Their full of reaper tech...that makes Big Boom Boom: We're talking about something between a mini-nuke to an actual nuke. y the reapers he's an meatbag with damage control:

*cleans out ears*...Sorry what were you two saying? ....Big Boom Boom you say.....your mom is damage control.

...I need a drink :You'll get some in a minute the citadel is coming into view: Great bring us in. Yes my derange friend the three B's and after we're done here we go there. *turrets come out and aim at you* :WATCH WHAT YOU SAY ABOUT MY MOTHER YOU GOD FORSAKEN DERANGE MEATBAG!!!!!: *steps behind a turrets* Shit!!

We all need a drink and its not like the Reaper Boom Boom weapons are going anywhere. .......Uh....if you forget what I said.....you can have a digital cookie......and....OH LOOK THE CITADEL LETS FORGET WE TALKED ABOUT ANYTHING SEE YA!!!

...What? :let me kill him please: Sorry mate. :That's what I thought freaking meatbag: Can you just land us please? :Sure thing:

Sorry H.A.I, but I have to give you a I.O.U to kill me at a different time. Alright, we're finally at the Citadel itself and all that. So what should we do first...ah crap I forgot about the stupid security checkpoint.

:go to hell and rot meatbag: *sighs* Yeah I know what you mean. Lets start at the embassies and screw with the politicians or to Chora's den that place is still open...I think.

I love you too Mmmm dicking around with a bunch of old stuck up douchbags who could get us arrested or killed....sounds like fun. Dude we go up to them and air-quote whatever they are talking about and dismiss it....LIKE A BOSS!!! Also about Chora's Dens.....didn't the owner had his head blown off or something.

:...: I'm going to dismiss that...see, yeah he did by some Shepard guy or was Rex ether is fine but its still open. So lets PARTY!!!! :I'll just go talk to some friends: Wait, what? who are you friends with? :A girl name E.D.I and a collective know as legion...why?: *has a stun look*

Like I dismissed your mom...lol. Mmmmm Shepard?...Rex?....eh never mind.....lets party like it's 2099 with blackjack and hookers. *equally stunned look*.....SINCE THE F*CK WHEN!!!!!

:...: Um I thought that was a bad year...but still. :I believe you should look for a ship designer: Why? :I'm hoping for a upgrade:
Okay...F*CK SHOULD I KNOW? :calm down please:

.....All those people.......*sniff* So what kind of upgrade are we talking about....is it the kind that makes sandwiches? Well your "friends" with them how can you NOT know?

:...: :It's the kind that will make me more attractive to people: you just want me to get a holo-projector, so you can lo- :SHUT UP!!:
knew it! Do you think I just wlatz on in and say 'wat' up m'homys'. :Will powl be there: yeah I guess, why? :he sooooo CUTE <3: 'kay?

Why just get her a holo body if we could get her a robo body instead you know what I mean. It would be funny as hell to film you doing that.....how come you guys have awesome cool friends and I don't....wait I do have awesome friends *holds up right hand* Hey Mr.Handson, I wasn't expecting to see you here. Mr.Handson?: Hey friend I wasn't expecting to see you here either. Well since your here you wanna bring one of your maginzines for old times sake and find a nice quiet spot and maybe let me give you a ha- Me: DUDE SHUT UP NOT HERE!!!! This is why I cannot hang out with you in public....*notice the stares* It's nothing folks move along.

ecause I don't need people touching me: I just bet you don't. :Go to hell: ...I think imma gonna hurl. :Is it possible for a starship to hurl?:
I don't know but lets not find out. :...captain I'm scared: It's OK it will be over soon.

Hey I was just a suggestion no need for anyone to go to hell. Heheheh I'm not crazy you are all just envy my awesome cool friend....what's that....you want me to acidentally delete H.A.I. but why.....that is a good reason to get rid or her.

:I hope you die a slow and painful death: God thats a little harsh isn't? :...no: *turrets come back and points at you* :You even try and I'll make you into swish cheese!: Stay away from the computers from now on. :...go to hell:

*glare* Ok.....crazy moment is over I'm fine.....kinda.....so about those awesome cool friends of yours.

:...: Your going to be the death of me, I swear it. And there at...um, H.A.I where are they? :Fiona's cals di anos'ik: What? :Fiona's tavern: Thanks and serf the exernet for you upgrades :<3 thanks <3:

See ya H.A.I. and don't make us catch you looking at robot porn. Fiona's Tavern huh.....*talks with a Italian accent* Let's a go.